I am on a heart driven mission to empower women to thrive in their lives!
I support women to embrace self-love, honor their self-worth, and own their personal power to live a life in alignment with their highest self and highest happiness.
Through my work with clients, I have witnessed women radically transform their lives in a short time: relationships become more loving and supportive; they discover their life purpose and create an inspired life; achieve goals; start their own businesses; move through transition with grace, and shift from feeling helpless, lost and alone to owning their personal power and taking charge of their lives!
Working together, I will help you to discover your life purpose and create a life and career you love!
CHANGE IS POSSIBLE!
It takes courage, strength and commitment - but when you are ready to say enough is enough - I want POSITIVE CHANGE in my life - you are ready to go!
HOW DO I KNOW THIS? BECAUSE I'VE BEEN THERE.
Growing up I felt insecure and shy, uncomfortable in my own skin, and unaccepted. Many of us do. I'm going to be honest, being sensitive like this was tough.
On the other hand, out of my intense sensitivity grew some of my greatest strengths. One of the gifts of feeling not good enough, is that I am always striving to improve. "Learn and grow and 'get better'" was my inner mantra.
The other blessing of feeling not good enough is that I readily own up to my faults. (I was never short of having material to improve upon and research and study in the pursuit of "learn, grow and 'get better'.")
So, my sensitivity was both a curse and a blessing.
Being able to readily acknowledge my short-comings and always striving to improve helped me grow and evolve.
When I was thirty, I married an amazing man and lived an abundantly blessed life.
In this blessed life, I found my insecurities and self-doubt go though the roof. I was with a man who I admired so much that I couldn't believe he chose me to marry. I wanted to make him happy, I wanted him to love me and want me. I felt like I needed to be the best I could be all the time, so that he wouldn't find out that I'm a reject.
Everywhere I looked, TV, magazines, my friends, I subconsciously created standards to measure myself against. What I saw were all these fabulous women being the perfect wife: smart, worldly, interesting, funny and gorgeous. Husbands who adored them. Beautiful houses. Amazing chefs cooking gourmet, from the gardens that they planted, meals from scratch. Plus time to either work at an interesting career or volunteer or spearhead some new non-profit organization that was saving the world. This was the bar I held myself against.
A few years later, I was blessed again and gave birth to two remarkable children. Again, my insecurities and feelings of not being good enough escalated even higher.
I wanted to be the perfect wife AND the perfect mother!!
My friends and sister-in-law were the epitome of the perfect, happy mother with happy, shiny, plump babies. They were so giving and nurturing, making their children gourmet baby food from scratch, (and one of them, even after being the perfect wife and mother, still had time and energy to launch a gourmet, organic babyhood company!). My friends were super eco-conscious and organic everything. My friends in the city were the 'best of everything' moms.... Best preschools, best nanny's, best strollers, they took their babies to all of the best enrichment classes - Music and Me, French classes, they read newspapers out loud to them, AND they had the perfect bodies! They look like they exercised all day and never had the urge to eat a slice of white bread...ever!
This motherhood thing upped the ante way beyond my reach. I was already having a struggling, and coming-up short, to live up to being the perfect wife. A few years into childrearing, I looked around, and felt I was failing at everything.
Like I said, in the media, all the mothers looked happy, healthy and energetic. One could say to themselves, "Oh, that's an unrealistic ideal...." However, I couldn't. When I looked around me in my own life, real women were doing it all! My friends. My husbands colleagues wives, My sister-in-laws. Some worked, some didn't, but they all managed to appear to be the 'perfect wife' and 'perfect mother.' And what was happening with me?
On the outside, I tried so hard to portray the 'perfect' image. On the inside, I was STRUGGLING to keep a float.
Yes - my life on the outside was shiny and beautiful - Married to an outstanding man; I had two healthy, bright, energetic children; material abundance; etc... The whole nine-yards.
On the inside:
"I'm so fat it's ridiculous! Why can't I ever lose this baby weight! My husband must be disgusted with me."
"I'm so boring and uninteresting. I don't read books anymore - only parenting books. I don't even know what's happening in the world."
"My house is a mess. I'm so unorganized. God, I don't even have a job!"
"My kids are doing great - but that's not because of me - it's because they are in themselves great."
"All the other women around me are doing it all - Perfect wife. Perfect mother. Perfect bodies. They make time for everyone and everything - AND make it look effortless and easy to boot!"
"Geeze - why can't I get it together. What's wrong with me. I"m a total failure."
I became so obsessed with trying to live up to my own expectations of what I thought it meant to be a good mother and wife, to be better, and do a better job that I completely lost touch with my core. I neglected myself. I became co-dependent on my husband. I also stopped working, and no longer made money. I had the belief that it was the bread winner who was the one with the power in the relationship. I didn't value myself and felt not an once of self-worth.
This break from my inner source was detrimental to my well-being. For the longest time, I couldn't understand why. How could I be unhappy when I am so blessed? I felt guilty for being unhappy. I felt perhaps I wasn't appreciating all of my blessings and something was seriously wrong with me. I was breaking down.
When I couldn't take care of myself and be responsible for my own happiness and well-being, I wasn't able to take care of anyone or anything else in my life either. Everything around me began collapsing.
BUT EVERTYHTING CHANGED WHEN...
I came full circle. The sensitivity and lack of self-esteem that lead me into my deepest darkness also gave me the personality attributes that helped me break though and make my way back into the light.
Because I was able to look at myself honestly, and be willing to go deeper to examine the root causes and core beliefs causing my unhappiness, and a willingness to learn new ways of thinking, skills and tools, I was able to seek help and take ownership of doing the work to get healhty again.
I was finally motivated to make significant change in my life! My despair was a catalyst for personal awakening! I started on a path of self-discovery. I shifted from looking for my happiness through others, to looking for my happiness within.
I took action and invested in myself and my own well-being. I hired a life coach. I had worked with therapists in the past, but life coaching was radically different. I not only visioned the life I wanted, but I created the life I wanted.
I started on the path to making a connection with the inner-voice of my true self, and practicing inner kindness. Instead of looking at myself and noting all of the things I thought I was failing at, I started looking for those things I was doing well.
THIS CONSCIOUS SHIFT IN PERSPECTIVE WAS LIFE CHANGING!
I realized that I was at choice in creating my life experience. I could choose where I would place my focus. I could choose love, or I could choose fear. I chose love and my life began to change for the better dramatically.
Another powerful turning point in my personal transformation was this shift in perspective:
I had the core belief that Self-care was selfish. Then I came to understand that the truth is
PRACTICING SELF-CARE IS BEING SELF-REPSONIBLE!
Instead of being co-dependent, and looking to my husband and kids to make me feel loved, I began looking to myself. I tuned-in and listened to my inner voice. What did I need to do for myself to feel loved? What could I do to love and nurture myself? Then, honored my inner voice by taking action! I took bubble baths, I started exercising again, I began painting again. I started doing the things that brought me true joy and fed my soul.
When I began practicing self-care and rebuilding the inner connection with my true self, I started to trust in mySelf. I started to come back to life.
I DISCOVERED MY SELF-WORTH WHEN.....
I began studying A Course in Miracles, and I read Marianne Williamson's, A Return to Love. Today, this is the foundation of my belief system.
This truth spoke deeply to me:
We are a miracle of life here on Earth. Each of us has an important role to play, and this world needs our true, authentic spirits to shine brightly! .... AND this includes ME! ..... and it includes YOU!
YOU are important in this world! Shine your light brightly!!
WHICH BRINGS ME TO TODAY....
Today, I am back in full-force and living my life purpose.
I am not ashamed to share my story with you because I think many women out there suffer alone in the dark the same way I did. I want them to know that they are not alone. I have been there and come through the other side into the light. It is my heart's desire to share the knowledge and tools, wisdom and guidance I have gained through my experience with them to help them come back into the light too.
It is my hearts mission to empower women to discover their life purpose,
and create a life and careeer they love!
So get ready to take your life to the next level! It's going to be an amazing journey!
Sandy Shaw is on a heart-driven mission to empower women to thrive in their lives, embrace self-love, honor their self-worth, and own their personal power to live a life in alignment with their highest self and highest happiness.
A Certified Life Coach, mentor, inspirational speaker and writer, Sandy empowers women to discover their life purpose and create a life and career they love.
Sandy has a Bachelor of Science from the University of Akron, has 20 years of marketing experience and 15 years teaching and mentoring women and girls to express their authentic selves in the world.
Sandy Shaw is a certified life coach from Life Purpose Institue and a member of the International Coaches Federation.